There is a trait among American businessmen that always want to do it bigger and better than anyone else (well, except when it comes to Skyscrapers - see Dubai, Japan; Partying - see Rio de Janeiro, Australia; Automobiles - see Japan, Germany; Healthcare - see Netherlands, Canada) and are willing to push their businesses past milestones and goals, and set these goals to the limits of what can be imagined. I get it, and it’s a generally noble trait to have. Generally. It works when it comes to elevators and medicine. But it doesn’t work in EVERY business. Enough is enough when it comes to certain, specific industries. One of said industries is the t-shirt industry.
I’m a big fan of t-shirts, thus leading me to own quite a few and to have a discernible expertise in them as well. As you may expect free ones (from races, or credit card sign-ups, or from your Dad’s underwear drawer) tend to be less comfortable than ones you pay over $20. The more stylish a t-shirt, generally the better fitting one. And like jeans and sneakers, the longer you own it, the more worn in it becomes, the better it feels to you. The T-Shirt Industry figured this out a few years back and began manufacturing materials that, while new, felt as if they’d been worn for half a decade. They tend to be thinner and softer than the Hanes you buy out of the packet. I’m all for it and I’ve purchased many of these types of shirts made of this type of material. I also have worn in a few t-shirts that now are thin and soft and are great for laying around in. But I also recognize when I’ve worn these things in TOO much. This is where the T-Shirt Industry seems to be heading. I recently purchased some T’s from a hipster store and when they arrived (purchased online…I didn’t have them mailed from the mall) I threw one on. Woah. Yes, these things were thin and they were soft. But much thinner and much softer than my last ‘hip, worn in’ t-shirt. It’s like every other business in that they saw that thin and soft is a hit, so why not make ‘em thinner and softer!? Let me tell you why. It’s borderline indecent at this point to wear this thing out in public, but if we continue on this trend, we’re not too far from just wearing a collar and seams.
So let’s chalk this last push towards a thin, soft, “worn in” new, t-shirt as the limit to what man and science are capable of doing. For the sake of us all, and for the sake of my nipples.
